Meaning of relationships?

I was at a conference recently, and we got into a debate about the ethics of relational youthwork. I argued strongly, that if we are in any kind of relationship then we stay in that relaitonship regardless of whether people do what we want and when we want them to do it. This came out of a discussion as to whether or not we act ethically by not telling people that we are in relaitoship with them because we want them to become Christians. But surely the deffinition of relationships means that we are in that relationship whatever the outcome, and just because someone does or does not become a Christian does not determine whether the relaitonship carries on or not. any thoghts on the ethics of relationships.